Monday Afternoon

my job blew off for the day
and I came back to the studio to get a few things done
but ended up crawling into the loft
to take a nap at 11 AM
I didn't mean to sleep that hard or long
but a series of dreams had me
one was about Shanie, who I just broke up with
and another was Diane, my sister
who I told to fuck off a few years ago
then there was a knock on the studio door
I screamed "who is it" twice
but there was no answer
an envelope slid under the door
and half asleep I had to crawl down and open it
and saw her drive away
gawd, another woman with a crush
I got a phone message from Jane yesterday
telling me that she has been trying to e-mail me
and it just kept coming back to her undeliverable
"do you have a new e-mail address?"
I called her back and left a rather cold message
telling her the new address and:
"hope your well"
I saw Liz the other day
but she was smart and didn't try
to engage me in any conversation
(but I did notice the white cotton dress)
I did my laundry and went swimming
at Nancy's house yesterday
I'm glad we get along so well lately
she doesn't want anything from me anymore
except friendship
and so do I
Shanie just called, and I was quite a prick
I told her good bye last friday
when she was leaving for a camping trip
and to scatter her grandfathers ashes somewhere
but she likes to be abused, it's all she knows
I'm taking Beth to get her first tattoo tonight
right on her ass
I spent two hours on the phone last night
with Becky
you know, just getting to know her

did you ever see the movie: "The Fly?"
I sometimes think of the end
when he mutated so much
he just grabbed the shotgun barrel
and held it at his head
wanting her to euthanize him
I bet it was a monday